ARSENAL 3 STOKE CITY 1
by Ricky Butler at the Emirates Stadium
CRISIS-club Arsenal went back to the top of the Barclays Premier League with a comfortable victory over Mark Hughes' new-look Stoke side at the Emirates on Sunday.
And it was deadline day record signing - pass-master Mesut Ozil - who was the architect with another three assists as Arsene Wenger's side continue to confound the critics.
After a tough summer when many were questioning his future, Wenger has quietly assembled a very good group of players who finally look ready to end the much talked about trophy drought. The addition of Ozil could prove to be the final piece of the jigsaw.
The little German has played just two Premier League matches for the club but the king of the assist is top of the assist table with four to his credit already.
The squad is still a little short on numbers perhaps, although when Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain, Lukas Podolski, Tomas Rosicky and Santi Cazorla all return from injury, Arsenal will have an abundance of riches in attacking areas.
There was some good news for Wenger on the injury front however, with Mikel Arteta coming on for the final 12 minutes following a thigh injury that has kept him out since pre-season.
"He is a technical leader on the pitch so it is great to have him available again," said the Arsenal boss.
While the £42.5m signing of Ozil has captured the imagination, it may well be a returning Frenchman on a free who could prove to be Wenger's best piece of summer business.
Mathieu Flamini has slipped effortlessly back into the Gunners midfield, offering a solid base for the likes of Ozil, Jack Wilshere and in-form Aaron Ramsey to pull the strings further forward.
In fact it was Ramsey who profited from a 4th minute Ozil set piece to fire Arsenal ahead - his 7th goal of an incredible season.
Wilshere was fouled 25 yards from goal by Charlie Adam and when Stoke goalkeeper Asmir Begovic could only push out the German's free kick, Ramsey arrived to fire home from six yards.
All credit to Hughes' side who are clearly trying to change their style this season. While still being combative in midfield, they are now playing a more measured, passing game and this was emphasised by their equaliser midway through the first half.
Steven Nzonzi exposed the apparent weakness at the heart of the Arsenal defence with a neat ball over the top which Marko Arnautovic turned onto the post. But full back Geoff Cameron, who had started the move by winning the ball on halfway and charging forward, finished it with a first time effort from 16 yards.
Wenger's side, looking leggy after their midweek Champions League exploits, could have buckled but they managed to rouse themselves again to regain the lead 10 minutes later. This time it was a corner delivery from Ozil that created the opportunity for compatriot Per Mertersacker to glance home a backwards header from 10 yards.
And it was that man Ozil again who made it a hat-trick of assists 20 minutes from time. Wilshere bought a foul from Jon Walters on the left side of the penalty area and Ozil's floated free kick was headed home by Bacary Sagna at the far post - his first goal in over 18 months. Three Arsenal goals from set-pieces against Stoke. Who would have thought it?
Wenger said: "It is unusual for us to score from set pieces, especially against a team like Stoke. But the delivery was the most important part of that.
"We have established a good run (since Aston Villa) and after a Champions League game it is very important to win, and we did it today.
"I think we had two halves; the first was fluent and the second half we looked jaded physically. In the end we lost our technical quality.
"But we have shown another aspect as well; that we can dig in and fight when we were under pressure.
"It's been a good week for us. We won in Marseille, we won in Sunderland and we won today so it has been a very positive week."
Stoke boss Hughes was not happy about the goals his side conceded. He said: "We are disappointed with the manner of the goals, we lost three goals to set
plays and that's not something we usually do.
"And I don't think there are many
occasions where Arsenal score from free-kicks or from balls into the box.
"We showed good courage to get on level terms, but their second goal was
disappointing. In the second half we looked like we were the more likely to
score but when they got a third it took the wind out of our sails."
Arsenal was thrown a last-minute curve ball with the withdrawal of abdominal-injury victim Theo Walcott just before kick off, giving 18-year old Serge Gnabry, the least known of Arsenal's four Germans, a first Premier League start.
Although the teenager looks another exciting prospect and showed some nice touches, he lacked the attacking thrust of the Englishman and as a result the Gunners attacking play often appeared pedestrian.
But thanks to the prompting of Ozil, they still had more than enough to seal a seventh win on the spin. Not bad for a club in crisis.
ARSENAL - Szczesny 6, Sagna 7, Mertersacker 7, Koscielny 7, Gibbs 7, Wilshere 6 (Monreal 6, 72), Flamini 7, RAMSEY 8, Gnabry 6( Miyachi 6, 72), Giroud 6, Ozil 7(Atreta 7, 79).
STOKE CITY - Begovic 7, Pieters 6 (Palacios 5, 66), Huth 6, Shawcross 6, Cameron 7, Arnautovic, 7 Wilson 7, Adam 5 (Ireland 5, 58), Nzonzi 7, Jones 5 (Pennant 5, 75), Walters 6.
REFEREE - M. Dean 7 - The sign of a good referee is that you rarely notice him and Dean went about his work with the minimum of fuss.
I am Richard Butler and this is my blog site. I am a football media professional who has worked for Accrington Stanley FC, Dagenham & Redbridge FC and Northallerton Town FC. I have also written for The Lancashire Telegraph, The Football League Paper, The Darlington & Stockton Times and many others. I am founder of Butler Sports TV, a small media company whose aim it is to give improved coverage of grass roots sports clubs.
Sunday, 22 September 2013
Friday, 20 September 2013
Opening home defeat not usually a bad thing for Arsenal
ARSENAL'S great form since the opening day home defeat by Aston Villa should not really have come as any great surprise. History shows that defeat in their opening home match of the season is usually the sign of a trophy-winning campaign for the Gunners.
Lets look at the facts. Since losing 2-1 at home to Liverpool on the opening day of the 1987-88 season, Arsenal have lost their first home match on four occasions and each time the club has gone on to lift a trophy.
In 1988-89, it was again Aston Villa who left Highbury with all three points in the first home match with a 3-2 success. But the season would see Arsenal crowned champions after the now infamous 2-0 last day win at Anfield.
The next time Arsenal would lose their opening home match was on the day first day of the Premier League in August 1992. Despite leading 2-0 at half time against Norwich City, Arsenal was on the wrong end of a 4-2 defeat in front of the mural, but the season ended with George Graham's side lifting both the League Cup and FA Cup - the first club ever to win that particular double.
The following 1993-94 season again began with a home defeat as a Mickey Quinn hat-trick gave Coventry a 3-0 success on the day the new North Bank stand opened. But the campaign ended in glory as Arsenal won the European Cup Winners Cup with victory over Parma in Copenhagen.
It would be another eight years before Arsenal would lose their opening home match again - Leeds United winning 2-1 at Highbury in August 2001. However, the season would end with the Gunners winning their third double after victories over Manchester United and Chelsea in the space of four days.
Since then, Arsenal have only once lost their opening home league match - Liverpool leaving the Emirates with a 2-0 victory in 2011. However, that was not the opening home match that season as Arsenal had beaten Udinese 1-0 in a Champions League qualifier four days earlier.
So if history is to repeat itself, Arsenal will be celebrating a long-awaited trophy success next May.
Lets look at the facts. Since losing 2-1 at home to Liverpool on the opening day of the 1987-88 season, Arsenal have lost their first home match on four occasions and each time the club has gone on to lift a trophy.
In 1988-89, it was again Aston Villa who left Highbury with all three points in the first home match with a 3-2 success. But the season would see Arsenal crowned champions after the now infamous 2-0 last day win at Anfield.
The next time Arsenal would lose their opening home match was on the day first day of the Premier League in August 1992. Despite leading 2-0 at half time against Norwich City, Arsenal was on the wrong end of a 4-2 defeat in front of the mural, but the season ended with George Graham's side lifting both the League Cup and FA Cup - the first club ever to win that particular double.
The following 1993-94 season again began with a home defeat as a Mickey Quinn hat-trick gave Coventry a 3-0 success on the day the new North Bank stand opened. But the campaign ended in glory as Arsenal won the European Cup Winners Cup with victory over Parma in Copenhagen.
It would be another eight years before Arsenal would lose their opening home match again - Leeds United winning 2-1 at Highbury in August 2001. However, the season would end with the Gunners winning their third double after victories over Manchester United and Chelsea in the space of four days.
Since then, Arsenal have only once lost their opening home league match - Liverpool leaving the Emirates with a 2-0 victory in 2011. However, that was not the opening home match that season as Arsenal had beaten Udinese 1-0 in a Champions League qualifier four days earlier.
So if history is to repeat itself, Arsenal will be celebrating a long-awaited trophy success next May.
Can Giroud emulate Smith and fire Arsenal to title glory?
OLIVIER GIROUD'S fine start to the season has brought comparisons to former Arsenal great Alan Smith. Apart from sharing a similar playing style - tall, good in the air, great with their back to goal - both also had very similar starts to their Arsenal careers.
Despite scoring a hat-trick against Portsmouth early in 1987-88, Smith failed to convince for much of his first season at Highbury. He could look cumbersome and awkward at times and many fans were left wondering if he really was much better than the much-maligned Niall Quinn, the striker he had been bought to replace.
In fact by Christmas 1987, Smith had been dropped to the bench in favour of the hapless Quinn. Yes, that was how badly he had been playing. However, a goal from bench at Portsmouth on New Year's Day 1988 signalled a change in fortune for Smith and by the end of the season, the former Leicester man had began to show exactly what he could do.
In the end, Smith finished his first campaign at Arsenal with 16 goals in all competitions, including one at Wembley in the Littlewoods Cup final defeat to Luton Town. But as the club chased a big-name striker throughout the summer of 1988, it appeared Smith's days could be numbered.
Giroud's first season at Arsenal proved to be very similar. He also took a while to settle and many fans were wondering if he was good enough. He could look cumbersome and awkward and found himself in and out of the side. But like Smith, it was an appearance from the bench around Christmas time that proved to be the turning point.
Giroud's two goals in the 7-3 win over Newcastle last December began a great run of form for the Frenchman and he ended his first season at the club with 17 goals in all competitions. Like Smith before him, however, many fans were left wondering if he really was the man to lead Arsenal to glory.
Arsenal spent the summer of 1988 chasing a striker and were close to splashing out a club record fee on West Ham's Tony Cottee. However, when the deal fell through and Cottee moved to Everton instead, Smith was thrown into the side for the league opener at Wimbledon.
Arsenal won 5-1 that day and Smith claimed a hat-trick. He would never look back. In fact he would score in each of the opening eight league matches as Arsenal went to the top of the table. Suddenly he had become the fulcrum of the attack and he would finish the season as the Golden Boot winner as Arsenal won their first league title in 18 years.
Fast-forward to the summer of 2013. Arsenal was again chasing a big name striker. Names like Higuain, Rooney and Suarez were all linked to the club but when they fell through, it was Giroud who began the season as Arsenal's centre forward.
And here we are four games into the campaign with the Frenchman having scored in each. He has become the fulcrum of the attack and it is now hard to imagine an Arsenal side without him in it. Of course it is still early days but I certainly would not bet against Giroud scoring the goals that lead to Arsenal ending another long title drought.
It has been said that a team are only good as its centre forward and back in 1988-89 that was certainly true for George Graham's Arsenal side - Smith scoring 23 times as they lifted the title. This season, will it be the goals of Giroud that will fire the Gunners to similar glory?
Despite scoring a hat-trick against Portsmouth early in 1987-88, Smith failed to convince for much of his first season at Highbury. He could look cumbersome and awkward at times and many fans were left wondering if he really was much better than the much-maligned Niall Quinn, the striker he had been bought to replace.
In fact by Christmas 1987, Smith had been dropped to the bench in favour of the hapless Quinn. Yes, that was how badly he had been playing. However, a goal from bench at Portsmouth on New Year's Day 1988 signalled a change in fortune for Smith and by the end of the season, the former Leicester man had began to show exactly what he could do.
In the end, Smith finished his first campaign at Arsenal with 16 goals in all competitions, including one at Wembley in the Littlewoods Cup final defeat to Luton Town. But as the club chased a big-name striker throughout the summer of 1988, it appeared Smith's days could be numbered.
Giroud's first season at Arsenal proved to be very similar. He also took a while to settle and many fans were wondering if he was good enough. He could look cumbersome and awkward and found himself in and out of the side. But like Smith, it was an appearance from the bench around Christmas time that proved to be the turning point.
Giroud's two goals in the 7-3 win over Newcastle last December began a great run of form for the Frenchman and he ended his first season at the club with 17 goals in all competitions. Like Smith before him, however, many fans were left wondering if he really was the man to lead Arsenal to glory.
Arsenal spent the summer of 1988 chasing a striker and were close to splashing out a club record fee on West Ham's Tony Cottee. However, when the deal fell through and Cottee moved to Everton instead, Smith was thrown into the side for the league opener at Wimbledon.
Arsenal won 5-1 that day and Smith claimed a hat-trick. He would never look back. In fact he would score in each of the opening eight league matches as Arsenal went to the top of the table. Suddenly he had become the fulcrum of the attack and he would finish the season as the Golden Boot winner as Arsenal won their first league title in 18 years.
Fast-forward to the summer of 2013. Arsenal was again chasing a big name striker. Names like Higuain, Rooney and Suarez were all linked to the club but when they fell through, it was Giroud who began the season as Arsenal's centre forward.
And here we are four games into the campaign with the Frenchman having scored in each. He has become the fulcrum of the attack and it is now hard to imagine an Arsenal side without him in it. Of course it is still early days but I certainly would not bet against Giroud scoring the goals that lead to Arsenal ending another long title drought.
It has been said that a team are only good as its centre forward and back in 1988-89 that was certainly true for George Graham's Arsenal side - Smith scoring 23 times as they lifted the title. This season, will it be the goals of Giroud that will fire the Gunners to similar glory?
Monday, 2 September 2013
Giroud goal sees off big-spending Spurs
ARSENAL 1 SPURS 0
By Ricky Butler at the Emirates Stadium
A FIRST half goal of real quality from Olivier Giroud settled a tense North London derby at the Emirates on Sunday as Arsenal's miserly defence showed it is not necessarily about how much you spend.
Spurs, who have splashed out nearly £107m this summer, arrived on the back of four wins from four matches in all competitions this season, while Arsene Wenger's side, with only two free transfers brought in so far, had apparently been going through something of a crisis.
Not that you would have known it here as they produced a display of real grit and determination to show that money cannot buy this kind of team spirit. In fact it was the sort of performance that used to be synonymous with the club - 1-0 to the Arsenal.
Of course this result will not have changed Wenger's need to bring in new recruitments ahead of today's transfer deadline, but perhaps things are not quite as bad in this part of North London as many would have you believe.
This crucial and hard fought victory was achieved with a threadbare squad too. Already depleted by injuries to Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain, Lukas Podolski and Thomas Vermaelen, Wenger's plans were further disrupted by illness to Bacary Sagna and Jack Wilshere.
While the England midfield man was considered fit enough to start, he did not make it to half time before being replaced by Wenger's most recent signing, the returning Mathieu Flamini - on a free transfer of course.
But despite conceding far more possession at the Emirates than they usually do, make no mistake about it, Arsenal fully deserved this victory.
After a bright start in which Santi Cazorla had twice threatened with free kicks, the Gunners were forced back by a Spurs side who looked determined not to suffer a third successive 5-2 defeat on the ground of their bitter rivals.
It was therefore no real surprise that when the goal arrived - midway through the first half - it was scored on the counter attack. Cazorla and Aaron Ramsey combined with Tomas Rosicky, who fed Theo Walcott down the right.
With Michael Dawson playing him onside, the England winger advanced towards the bye-line before drilling a low cross into the six yard box for the late-arriving Giroud to stab home with the outside of his left foot.
With talk of a big-money striker arriving, the Frenchman has now scored four goals in five matches this season and is really starting to look the part.
Arsenal could now relax and Walcott was denied by Hugo Lloris as Wenger's side looked for some breathing space before the break.
The second half followed a similar pattern, with the visitors dominating possession but playing mainly in front of an Arsenal defence that looked strong and organised, and the visitors rarely threatened Wojciech Szczesny's goal.
In fact it was the Gunners who came closest to a second when only a fine save from Lloris denied his compatriot Giroud after another rapid counter-attack.
Arsenal came under an inevitable Spurs onslaught in the final 10 minutes and Szczesny had to be at his best to keep out a deflected effort from substitute Jermain Defoe.
But that was as close as Andre Villas-Boas' side came to preserving their unbeaten start and it was the much-maligned Wenger who was celebrating at the final whistle.
The Arsenal boss said: "In the end we had to hang on because we could not score the second goal. It was a very intense game but overall I feel we deserved it as their goalkeeper was their best player.
"We have had some very intense games in the last two weeks and we had to dig deep to win in the end."
When asked about the form of Giroud, Wenger said: "Last year, he came to a new league which is a level up and he had to adapt. Now in his second season he is more comfortable and you can see from his movement and technique how much he has improved."
"He is a fantastic guy with a great charisma and he was a real leader on the pitch today."
Villas Boas, meanwhile, felt his side were a little unfortunate to come away from the Emirates empty-handed again. He said: "It was very tight in the first half and they had one or two opportunities but I thought the second half was very, very strong from us.
"I thought we deserved something in the end. Arsenal was more clinical in front of goal but I thought a draw would have been a fair result."
There was more bad news for the Spurs boss last night when it was revealed that Real Madrid had finally completed the signing of Gareth Bale for a world record fee of 100m Euros.
ARSENAL - Szczesny 7, Jenkinson 6, Mertesacker 8, Koscielny 8, Gibbs 7, Ramsey 8, Wilshere 5 (Flamini 43, 7), Rosicky 7 (Monreal 78, 6) Cazorla 8, Walcott 7 (Sagna 90), GIROUD 9.
SPURS - Lloris 8, Walker 6, Dawson 5, Vertonghen 6, Rose 7, Dembele 6 (Defoe 67, 6), Paulinho 6, Capoue 6 (Sandro 73, 6), Chadli 7, Townsend 7 (Lamela 73, 6), Soldado 5.
REFEREE - M Oliver 7
ATTENDANCE: 60.071
By Ricky Butler at the Emirates Stadium
A FIRST half goal of real quality from Olivier Giroud settled a tense North London derby at the Emirates on Sunday as Arsenal's miserly defence showed it is not necessarily about how much you spend.
Spurs, who have splashed out nearly £107m this summer, arrived on the back of four wins from four matches in all competitions this season, while Arsene Wenger's side, with only two free transfers brought in so far, had apparently been going through something of a crisis.
Not that you would have known it here as they produced a display of real grit and determination to show that money cannot buy this kind of team spirit. In fact it was the sort of performance that used to be synonymous with the club - 1-0 to the Arsenal.
Of course this result will not have changed Wenger's need to bring in new recruitments ahead of today's transfer deadline, but perhaps things are not quite as bad in this part of North London as many would have you believe.
This crucial and hard fought victory was achieved with a threadbare squad too. Already depleted by injuries to Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain, Lukas Podolski and Thomas Vermaelen, Wenger's plans were further disrupted by illness to Bacary Sagna and Jack Wilshere.
While the England midfield man was considered fit enough to start, he did not make it to half time before being replaced by Wenger's most recent signing, the returning Mathieu Flamini - on a free transfer of course.
But despite conceding far more possession at the Emirates than they usually do, make no mistake about it, Arsenal fully deserved this victory.
After a bright start in which Santi Cazorla had twice threatened with free kicks, the Gunners were forced back by a Spurs side who looked determined not to suffer a third successive 5-2 defeat on the ground of their bitter rivals.
It was therefore no real surprise that when the goal arrived - midway through the first half - it was scored on the counter attack. Cazorla and Aaron Ramsey combined with Tomas Rosicky, who fed Theo Walcott down the right.
With Michael Dawson playing him onside, the England winger advanced towards the bye-line before drilling a low cross into the six yard box for the late-arriving Giroud to stab home with the outside of his left foot.
With talk of a big-money striker arriving, the Frenchman has now scored four goals in five matches this season and is really starting to look the part.
Arsenal could now relax and Walcott was denied by Hugo Lloris as Wenger's side looked for some breathing space before the break.
The second half followed a similar pattern, with the visitors dominating possession but playing mainly in front of an Arsenal defence that looked strong and organised, and the visitors rarely threatened Wojciech Szczesny's goal.
In fact it was the Gunners who came closest to a second when only a fine save from Lloris denied his compatriot Giroud after another rapid counter-attack.
Arsenal came under an inevitable Spurs onslaught in the final 10 minutes and Szczesny had to be at his best to keep out a deflected effort from substitute Jermain Defoe.
But that was as close as Andre Villas-Boas' side came to preserving their unbeaten start and it was the much-maligned Wenger who was celebrating at the final whistle.
The Arsenal boss said: "In the end we had to hang on because we could not score the second goal. It was a very intense game but overall I feel we deserved it as their goalkeeper was their best player.
"We have had some very intense games in the last two weeks and we had to dig deep to win in the end."
When asked about the form of Giroud, Wenger said: "Last year, he came to a new league which is a level up and he had to adapt. Now in his second season he is more comfortable and you can see from his movement and technique how much he has improved."
"He is a fantastic guy with a great charisma and he was a real leader on the pitch today."
Villas Boas, meanwhile, felt his side were a little unfortunate to come away from the Emirates empty-handed again. He said: "It was very tight in the first half and they had one or two opportunities but I thought the second half was very, very strong from us.
"I thought we deserved something in the end. Arsenal was more clinical in front of goal but I thought a draw would have been a fair result."
There was more bad news for the Spurs boss last night when it was revealed that Real Madrid had finally completed the signing of Gareth Bale for a world record fee of 100m Euros.
ARSENAL - Szczesny 7, Jenkinson 6, Mertesacker 8, Koscielny 8, Gibbs 7, Ramsey 8, Wilshere 5 (Flamini 43, 7), Rosicky 7 (Monreal 78, 6) Cazorla 8, Walcott 7 (Sagna 90), GIROUD 9.
SPURS - Lloris 8, Walker 6, Dawson 5, Vertonghen 6, Rose 7, Dembele 6 (Defoe 67, 6), Paulinho 6, Capoue 6 (Sandro 73, 6), Chadli 7, Townsend 7 (Lamela 73, 6), Soldado 5.
REFEREE - M Oliver 7
ATTENDANCE: 60.071
Wednesday, 14 August 2013
Arsenal and big name signings - a potted history
I HAVE never understood this obsession with the transfer window. Perhaps being an Arsenal fan I have just got used to the fact that we are never going to make the big, exciting signings of clubs like Chelsea and Manchester United.
In fact since I first started supporting the club back in the late 1970s, I can count on one hand the number of really big name signings we have made. So why would anyone think this year will be any different.
The first big signing I can recall was back in the summer of 1976. Terry Neill had just taken over as manager, from Spurs of all places, and he wanted to make a big impression. He certainly did just that with the signing of Malcolm MacDonald from Newcastle.
At the time Super Mac was one of best strikers in the country and it was a great coup for the club. He went on to score 29 goals that season as Neill began building a side that would reach three consecutive FA Cup finals by the turn of the decade. Unfortunately Super Mac was forced to retire in 1979 due to a serious knee injury and missed the FA Cup success that year.
The early 1980s saw our best players depart (sound familiar?) and we were crying out for another signing to get excited about. The summer of 1982 brought one - Tony Woodcock. The former Nottingham Forest striker arrived from Cologne in a bid to fill the void left by the departure of Frank Stapleton a year earlier.
He was certainly a big name player at the time and a player I had always admired from his Forest days. He was a success on the pitch too, scoring 21 goals in his first season, and 23 in his second. But he could not inspire the team to glory and left four years later having won nothing with the club.
The following summer bought an even bigger arrival. Charlie Nicholas had scored over 50 goals for Celtic in the 1982-83 season and he was the hottest property in British football that summer. But he snubbed Manchester United and Liverpool to come to Highbury. There is no doubt this was a massive signing for the club at the time and excitement was at fever pitch as the season began.
But Nicholas took time to settle and his lack of goals, just 3 by Christmas, contributed to the sacking of Neill in December. Nicholas quickly became the fans favourite but there is no doubt that he failed to live up to the hype on the pitch. His 2 goals that won the Littlewoods Cup in 1987 apart, he often flattered to deceive and left in 1988 as one of football's great wasted talents.
The signing of Nicholas was the last really exciting arrival until that of Ian Wright, 8 years later. Wrighty had come to prominence with 2 goals for Crystal Palace in the 1990 FA Cup final and we were all thrilled when George Graham completed the signing in September 1991.
However, his arrival coincided with the decline of the team that had won the title the previous season, and although Wrighy's goals helped us win the domestic cup double in 1993 and the European Cup Winners Cup in 1994, the team became far too reliant on him. Of course he did end up breaking the club's goal-scoring record in 1997 and left a hero after helping us win the double in 1998.
All those signings paled into insignificance in the summer of 1995 however, when not only did England captain David Platt arrive, but also Dennis Bergkamp. This remains the biggest and most exciting signing we have ever made. Bergkamp was a superstar of world football at the time and I remember looking on in disbelief when I saw the pictures of him in an Arsenal shirt on the back page of the Daily Mirror whilst on holiday that summer.
This turned out to be not only the best signing in the clubs history but possibly in the history of English football as well. Quite simply, Bergkamp was the greatest footballer I had ever seen. Technically he was flawless and he inspired the team to seven major trophies in his 11 years at Highbury. The word legend is used too easily these days but it sums up Bergkamp perfectly.
Since then however, the nearest we have come to genuine big name signings are those of Andrey Arshavin in 2009 and Lukas Podolski last summer. Arshavin had been the star of Euro 2008 and was certainly an exciting arrival. At first he did not disappoint with a series of amazing performances (like the 4-goal haul at Anfield) but it soon went wrong and he left the club this summer after nearly two years in the wilderness.
The jury is still out on Podolski. As a German international of over 100 caps, there is no doubt he was a big name when he arrived, although most of us did not feel that pang of excitement we did for say Nicholas or Bergkamp.
I believe he could yet become one of our best ever signings, although I guess there is also a chance he could become the new Arshavin given Arsene Wenger's insistence on playing him on the wing.
So in conclusion, Arsenal rarely sign big names players and when they have done so it has rarely had the desired effect. Bergkamp and Wright apart, the others failed to win a single trophy with the club and were unable to significantly inspire those around them. It has always been the lesser known signings who have shone at Arsenal - Thierry Henry, Patrick Vieira, Cesc Fabregas, Robin van Persie etc. so perhaps this time next year we will all be singing the praises of a certain Yaya Sanogo.
With the start of the season less than four days away, that is what I will be trying to convince myself anyway.
In fact since I first started supporting the club back in the late 1970s, I can count on one hand the number of really big name signings we have made. So why would anyone think this year will be any different.
The first big signing I can recall was back in the summer of 1976. Terry Neill had just taken over as manager, from Spurs of all places, and he wanted to make a big impression. He certainly did just that with the signing of Malcolm MacDonald from Newcastle.
![]() |
| Malcolm MacDonald scored 29 in his first season at Highbury |
The early 1980s saw our best players depart (sound familiar?) and we were crying out for another signing to get excited about. The summer of 1982 brought one - Tony Woodcock. The former Nottingham Forest striker arrived from Cologne in a bid to fill the void left by the departure of Frank Stapleton a year earlier.
![]() |
| Tony Woodcock running at the Man. United defence in 1983 |
The following summer bought an even bigger arrival. Charlie Nicholas had scored over 50 goals for Celtic in the 1982-83 season and he was the hottest property in British football that summer. But he snubbed Manchester United and Liverpool to come to Highbury. There is no doubt this was a massive signing for the club at the time and excitement was at fever pitch as the season began.
![]() |
| Charlie Nicholas, who never lived up to the hype but always had nice hair |
The signing of Nicholas was the last really exciting arrival until that of Ian Wright, 8 years later. Wrighty had come to prominence with 2 goals for Crystal Palace in the 1990 FA Cup final and we were all thrilled when George Graham completed the signing in September 1991.
![]() |
| Wrighty doing what he did best - celebrating another goal |
All those signings paled into insignificance in the summer of 1995 however, when not only did England captain David Platt arrive, but also Dennis Bergkamp. This remains the biggest and most exciting signing we have ever made. Bergkamp was a superstar of world football at the time and I remember looking on in disbelief when I saw the pictures of him in an Arsenal shirt on the back page of the Daily Mirror whilst on holiday that summer.
![]() |
| The picture that got me so excited - Dennis Bergkamp in an Arsenal shirt |
Since then however, the nearest we have come to genuine big name signings are those of Andrey Arshavin in 2009 and Lukas Podolski last summer. Arshavin had been the star of Euro 2008 and was certainly an exciting arrival. At first he did not disappoint with a series of amazing performances (like the 4-goal haul at Anfield) but it soon went wrong and he left the club this summer after nearly two years in the wilderness.
The jury is still out on Podolski. As a German international of over 100 caps, there is no doubt he was a big name when he arrived, although most of us did not feel that pang of excitement we did for say Nicholas or Bergkamp.
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| Lukas Podolski, the latest big name signing |
So in conclusion, Arsenal rarely sign big names players and when they have done so it has rarely had the desired effect. Bergkamp and Wright apart, the others failed to win a single trophy with the club and were unable to significantly inspire those around them. It has always been the lesser known signings who have shone at Arsenal - Thierry Henry, Patrick Vieira, Cesc Fabregas, Robin van Persie etc. so perhaps this time next year we will all be singing the praises of a certain Yaya Sanogo.
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| Yaya Sanogo - the new Thierry Henry?? |
Wednesday, 7 August 2013
Carver and Mingoia give Stanley shock Riverside success
CAPITAL ONE CUP 1ST ROUND
MIDDLESBROUGH 1 ACCRINGTON STANLEY 2
By Ricky Butler at The Riverside Stadium
GOALS at the end of each half from teenager striker Marcus Carver and Piero Mingoia gave Accrington Stanley a shock Capital One Cup victory at the Riverside last night.
But it was only the heroics of goalkeeper Ian Dunbavin that ensured the League Two side held off a late Middlesbrough rally to take their place in the 2nd Round draw.
As for match winner Mingoia, who just a few weeks ago was without a club and facing an uncertain future, it showed the fickle nature of the game.
Inevitably Stanley found themselves under pressure from the start – Dunbavin called into action to deny Marvin Emnes inside three minutes - but they almost grabbed a shock 6th minute lead.
Peter Murphy did well down the right and when his cross found Michael Richardson at the far post, the Newcastle loanee’s first time effort was kept out by Middlesbrough goalkeeper Jayson Leutwiler. The danger was not quite over as the loose ball fell to Michael Liddle but he fired over the top with his weaker right foot.
“The spirit we have created in the dressing room has built up from the run we had at the end of last season. Middlesbrough threw everything at us but we were magnificent in the second phase of play and that has got us the result.
“A few more performances like this and I can see it being a couple of years before I go grey.”
Beleaguered Boro manager Tony Mowbray was philosophical about his side’s defeat.
“We went along way in this competition last year with no benefit, and it probably cost us with the number of games we played, so we’ll put it behind us and move on.”
REFEREE: Scott Duncan.
ATTENDANCE: 6,774
MIDDLESBROUGH 1 ACCRINGTON STANLEY 2
By Ricky Butler at The Riverside Stadium
GOALS at the end of each half from teenager striker Marcus Carver and Piero Mingoia gave Accrington Stanley a shock Capital One Cup victory at the Riverside last night.
But it was only the heroics of goalkeeper Ian Dunbavin that ensured the League Two side held off a late Middlesbrough rally to take their place in the 2nd Round draw.
Stanley boss James Beattie made three changes to the side that
had been beaten 4-1 three days earlier at Newport in the Skybet League Two opener
and they responded in magnificent style as they came from behind to knock out
the Championship side.
“It's a great feeling,” said the former Blackburn,
Southampton and England striker. “I said to the lads in the dressing room to
enjoy all the plaudits you are going to get and then focus your minds on
Saturday (against Portsmouth) which is another massive game."As for match winner Mingoia, who just a few weeks ago was without a club and facing an uncertain future, it showed the fickle nature of the game.
He said: “That sums up football really. I didn’t even know where I would be a few weeks ago but thankfully Accrington and the gaffer gave me a chance and I just want to give everything to repay the trust they shown in me.
“The boys are over the moon. We had a feeling there could be an upset tonight and we managed to do it.”Inevitably Stanley found themselves under pressure from the start – Dunbavin called into action to deny Marvin Emnes inside three minutes - but they almost grabbed a shock 6th minute lead.
Peter Murphy did well down the right and when his cross found Michael Richardson at the far post, the Newcastle loanee’s first time effort was kept out by Middlesbrough goalkeeper Jayson Leutwiler. The danger was not quite over as the loose ball fell to Michael Liddle but he fired over the top with his weaker right foot.
However, it was the Championship side that went in front
three minutes later. The Stanley defence failed to clear a corner from the
right and Jozsef Varga headed on for Lukas Jutkiewicz to round
Dunbavin and slot home.
And it was nearly 2-0 moments later when only a brave
last-ditch challenge from the outstanding Tom Aldred denied Jutkiewicz a second
at the far post.
But Stanley were surprisingly level five minutes before the
break thanks to a first senior goal from 19 year-old Carver.
A long throw from the right by Nicky Hunt found the head of
the teenager at the near post, and despite the best efforts of Middlesbrough defenders Justin Hoyte and Rhys Williams, the ball was adjudged to have crossed the line.
The second half saw a succession of last ditch blocks from
the heroic Stanley defence as the hosts were restricted to mainly long range
efforts from Grant Leadbitter.
Beattie threw on striker James Gray – born up the road in
Yarm - and winger Shay McCartan in a bid to win it in normal time and it paid dividends
nine minutes from the end. Will Hatfield’s corner from the right was flicked on
by Aldred and the ball fell invitingly for Mingoia to drill an unstoppable shot
past Leutwiler from 12 yards with the aid of a slight deflection.
It was backs-to-the-wall stuff for Stanley after that as Boro threw everything at them. But Dunbavin performed more heroics to deny
Ben Gibson, Adam Reach, Leadbitter and Varga to complete a great night for Beattie and his
troops.
“It is a great place to come and play," said the Stanley boss at the whistle. "I told the lads that passion overcomes logic and if there was going to be a shock this evening, I wanted it to be here at The Riverside. “The spirit we have created in the dressing room has built up from the run we had at the end of last season. Middlesbrough threw everything at us but we were magnificent in the second phase of play and that has got us the result.
“A few more performances like this and I can see it being a couple of years before I go grey.”
Beleaguered Boro manager Tony Mowbray was philosophical about his side’s defeat.
He said: “They defended exceptionally well and have scored from two set plays. You
can have all the ball in the world but if you don’t take your chances you can
get punished and that is what has happened tonight.
“We started pretty well and could have scored 2 or 3 times
before we took the lead but we have to take it on the chin and move on.“We went along way in this competition last year with no benefit, and it probably cost us with the number of games we played, so we’ll put it behind us and move on.”
MIDDLESBROUGH (4-4-2)
– Leutwiler 6, Hoyte 5, Williams(R) 6, Gibson 7, Friend 5, Leadbitter 6, Varga 6, Ledesma
5 (Main 72, 5), Carayol 5, Jutkiewicz 6 (Reach 72, 5), Emnes 5 (Williams(L) 78, 5) . Subs not
used – Steele, Halliday, Whitehead, Smallwood.
ACCRINGTON STANLEY
(4-2-3-1) – Dunbavin 9, Hunt 7, Aldred 9, Atkinson 8, Liddle 8, Clark 6 (McCartan 70, 6),
Richardson 8, Murphy 7, Hatfield 8, Mingoia 8 (Wilson 90, n/a), Carver 8 (Gray 70, 6). Subs not sued
– Joyce, Winnard, Miller, Windass.REFEREE: Scott Duncan.
ATTENDANCE: 6,774
Friday, 26 July 2013
Summertime - A season to relax or a time to panic
SUMMERTIME and the living is easy. At least that is how the song goes. For a football manager, however, summertime is far from easy.
Take Arsene Wenger for example. The club announce that they have trillions to spend in the transfer market and can now compete with all the big hitters around Europe so the media go into meltdown linking the club with everyone from Higuain to Rooney and even Suarez.
The fans, paying some of the highest ticket prices in Europe, are quickly on the bandwagon and suddenly it's late July with only French youngster Yaya Sanogo added the squad, so it is time to panic.
Manchester City have strengthened, Chelsea have strengthened, United are chasing Fabregas, while Arsenal have gone backwards. Not only has Wenger failed to spend but he also had a major clear out this summer, getting rid of squad players such as Djourou, Arshavin and Santos. On the surface at least, the squad appears weaker.
But maybe we all need to live a bit easier. Chill out. Enjoy the sunshine. Are things really that bad? The one thing money cannot buy is stability and that is the one thing Arsenal have in abundance.
While the other top clubs have all changed managers and brought in several new players, all of which takes time to settle, Wenger could start the season with the same group that lost only one of their last 16 Premier League games.
After a slow start to the last campaign as the new-look team took time to gel, Arsenal slowly began to look like potential title winners so why would you want to disrupt that?
Spending millions does not guarantee success anyway. Yes, City will be strong, no question about it. Chelsea too. But Wenger has a very good squad who will continue to improve.
Some say a signing like Suarez would send out a message of intent and that he would be the final piece of the jigsaw. But I disagree. If Wenger is going to spend upwards of £40m, it would be far better spent on a defensive midfielder - someone like Fellaini - and a centre back - say Williams.
I just have a sneaky feeling that Giroud will be THE man. For a first season in English football he did well, scoring 17 times, and his best is clearly yet to come. Walcott will score goals, Podolski has 15 in him and Cazorla proved last season he can hit double figures. Between them last season those four scored over 60 times.
So rather than splash out £40m on one man who may or may not get the goals the club needs, and would probably spend half the season suspended anyway, it would make much more sense to use that money elsewhere in the squad.
My hunch is that Wenger has made a cull to clear the decks for several new arrivals. One or two defensive players who can go straight into the first team squad and others with an eye to the future. It may not be what the fans are crying out for but that does not make it wrong.
So while City and Chelsea waste more billions chasing the dream, Wenger can pull up his deckchair safe in the knowledge that he already has a title winning team at his disposal.
It may not be fashionable but maybe spending the summertime living the easy life while all around are panicking is the way forward. I guess the next ten months or so will tell.
Friday, 19 July 2013
The drugs don't work, they just make you worse. How to really fix your broken mind
DID you watch that programme on BBC 3 the other night entitled 'Diary of a Broken Mind'? It was the story of 25 young people with mental health problems - anything from Bipolar to Agoraphobia - recorded as a video diary.
The one thing that really stood out for me was the over-reliance these people have on medication. It appeared that was the only treatment they were receiving. It had got so bad for most of them that they were unable to come off the medication as they felt they could not cope without it. A vicious circle.
Speaking from personal experience of mental health issues, I know this is common practise. My first day in treatment was spent filling out forms to access my mental state before the medication process could begin.
That day I encountered many young people who were so drugged up they could not even tell me what they were in for. Some did not even know their own name. There was one woman of Afro-Caribbean descent, probably no more than 22, who spent most of the day walking around in circles with a tea towel on her head shouting random things to herself, completely oblivious to anything else around her.
'Don't mind her,' they told me, 'She'll be okay once she has had her medication.'
That evening as they were settling me into my room they came round with the pills.
'Take two of these tonight and we'll give you another two in the morning,' I was told.
I asked what they were but all I was told was that 'they will make you feel better.' I told them I was not depressed (I wasn't) and that pills would be of no use to me but they said it was essential before I could start my therapy programme.
After what I had witnessed that day, I decided I did not want to take the pills but I was told that the only other option was for me to discharge myself. And I could not do that quickly enough. Looking back, it was the best decision I ever made. That was in 1986.
After watching BBC 3 the other night, it appears that very little has changed in the treatment of mental health issues over the subsequent 27 years. The only difference now is that young people feel able to talk about their problems.
When I was their age the last thing I would have wanted to do was go on national television telling millions of people about my mental health issues. In fact you may have noticed that I have not mentioned what those mental issues are even now.
But I do not believe this openness has helped them. Quite the opposite in fact. I was so worried about anyone finding out about my problems that I did all I could to hide them. On the outside I appeared normal. Well when I say normal...
Anyway, I would have been mortified if anyone had found out. Not even my parents knew. But this actually proved to be a great help to me. The more I had to disguise my behaviour, the easier it was to cope with my problems when I was alone. If I could go about my normal everyday tasks without anyone knowing then surely nothing could stop me leading a relatively normal life?
I have no doubt that my friends thought I was a little strange at times (only at times you say!!). As much as I tried to disguise it, there must have been times when it came to the surface. But if ever anyone looked at me as though I was mad and asked if I was okay, I just adopted the default response. 'Yeah, I'm fine.'
But all this new-found openness has given the sufferers some kind of acceptance. They do not need to change as everyone knows what is wrong them and make allowances for their odd behaviour. One of the biggest motivations I had to try and tackle my demons was the fear that someone would find out. Take away that motivation and I know I would have had much more difficulty dealing with my problems.
Not that I am cured. Far from it. I do not believe you are ever really cured of mental health problems, you just learn to cope with them. And despite never taking any medication, and only having 2 sessions of therapy in my life, I believe I have coped pretty well. I have led a reasonably 'normal' life (whatever that actually means) and although I have dark days, I know how to deal with them. I know the restrictions it has had on my life and I make the necessary adjustments. I have to, otherwise people will find out.
There was a time when it would stop me doing the things I enjoyed. I stopped playing football, I stopped going to watch my beloved Arsenal. For a while I became a virtual hermit. But you cannot live like that forever, not unless you want people to know you have a problem anyway.
I started to miss the things I enjoyed and decided enough was enough. Sometimes it is hard but I know what I need to do and I do it. I have refused to let it beat me.
But the young people on that programme have all but given up. They have accepted their fete. So much so that when asked if they could make their problems disappear would they, most said no. They are happy to stick with it as has given them an excuse not to get on with their life. I would get rid of mine at a heartbeat.
One guy, a former model, had turned to drink as his way of coping. Cooped up in his flat with a few cans of lager. Not tackling his issues, just accepting them. And he was not alone. As soon as your friends and family know, you have less reason to change. You can justify it.
In many aspects of our life openness is great. But when it comes to mental health issues it is not. The only people who should know about your problems are your therapist (if you have one) and the guys in group therapy sessions. The more time you spend pretending you don't have a problem the less serious the problem becomes.
Trust me, I know.
The one thing that really stood out for me was the over-reliance these people have on medication. It appeared that was the only treatment they were receiving. It had got so bad for most of them that they were unable to come off the medication as they felt they could not cope without it. A vicious circle.
Speaking from personal experience of mental health issues, I know this is common practise. My first day in treatment was spent filling out forms to access my mental state before the medication process could begin.
That day I encountered many young people who were so drugged up they could not even tell me what they were in for. Some did not even know their own name. There was one woman of Afro-Caribbean descent, probably no more than 22, who spent most of the day walking around in circles with a tea towel on her head shouting random things to herself, completely oblivious to anything else around her.
'Don't mind her,' they told me, 'She'll be okay once she has had her medication.'
That evening as they were settling me into my room they came round with the pills.
'Take two of these tonight and we'll give you another two in the morning,' I was told.
I asked what they were but all I was told was that 'they will make you feel better.' I told them I was not depressed (I wasn't) and that pills would be of no use to me but they said it was essential before I could start my therapy programme.
After what I had witnessed that day, I decided I did not want to take the pills but I was told that the only other option was for me to discharge myself. And I could not do that quickly enough. Looking back, it was the best decision I ever made. That was in 1986.
After watching BBC 3 the other night, it appears that very little has changed in the treatment of mental health issues over the subsequent 27 years. The only difference now is that young people feel able to talk about their problems.
When I was their age the last thing I would have wanted to do was go on national television telling millions of people about my mental health issues. In fact you may have noticed that I have not mentioned what those mental issues are even now.
But I do not believe this openness has helped them. Quite the opposite in fact. I was so worried about anyone finding out about my problems that I did all I could to hide them. On the outside I appeared normal. Well when I say normal...
Anyway, I would have been mortified if anyone had found out. Not even my parents knew. But this actually proved to be a great help to me. The more I had to disguise my behaviour, the easier it was to cope with my problems when I was alone. If I could go about my normal everyday tasks without anyone knowing then surely nothing could stop me leading a relatively normal life?
I have no doubt that my friends thought I was a little strange at times (only at times you say!!). As much as I tried to disguise it, there must have been times when it came to the surface. But if ever anyone looked at me as though I was mad and asked if I was okay, I just adopted the default response. 'Yeah, I'm fine.'
But all this new-found openness has given the sufferers some kind of acceptance. They do not need to change as everyone knows what is wrong them and make allowances for their odd behaviour. One of the biggest motivations I had to try and tackle my demons was the fear that someone would find out. Take away that motivation and I know I would have had much more difficulty dealing with my problems.
Not that I am cured. Far from it. I do not believe you are ever really cured of mental health problems, you just learn to cope with them. And despite never taking any medication, and only having 2 sessions of therapy in my life, I believe I have coped pretty well. I have led a reasonably 'normal' life (whatever that actually means) and although I have dark days, I know how to deal with them. I know the restrictions it has had on my life and I make the necessary adjustments. I have to, otherwise people will find out.
There was a time when it would stop me doing the things I enjoyed. I stopped playing football, I stopped going to watch my beloved Arsenal. For a while I became a virtual hermit. But you cannot live like that forever, not unless you want people to know you have a problem anyway.
I started to miss the things I enjoyed and decided enough was enough. Sometimes it is hard but I know what I need to do and I do it. I have refused to let it beat me.
But the young people on that programme have all but given up. They have accepted their fete. So much so that when asked if they could make their problems disappear would they, most said no. They are happy to stick with it as has given them an excuse not to get on with their life. I would get rid of mine at a heartbeat.
One guy, a former model, had turned to drink as his way of coping. Cooped up in his flat with a few cans of lager. Not tackling his issues, just accepting them. And he was not alone. As soon as your friends and family know, you have less reason to change. You can justify it.
In many aspects of our life openness is great. But when it comes to mental health issues it is not. The only people who should know about your problems are your therapist (if you have one) and the guys in group therapy sessions. The more time you spend pretending you don't have a problem the less serious the problem becomes.
Trust me, I know.
Tuesday, 16 July 2013
Lycra, the real menace on our roads
AS YOU ARE out and about today minding your own business there is a good chance you will encounter two of the most annoying types who are a blight on our roads and pavements.
Firstly, cyclists. Not your casual cyclist who rides to work on a sunny morning. No. I mean the Lycra-clad menaces who fill our streets, often 2-3 abreast, who assume the rules of the road do not apply to them.
Red lights? Pedestrian crossings? No, they don't have to stop at them. In fact these morons-on-two-wheels do not want to stop for anything. Too much traffic for them to squeeze past? Not a problem, they will just go on up the pavement, knocking pedestrians out of the way if they have to. One way street? That's okay, they are only going one way. The wrong way.
Yet you so much as overtake them slightly too close, which as far as they are concerned is within 25 feet of them, they will scream and shout and make hand gestures. And it is you in your car who has to take action to avoid them when they suddenly swerve to avoid a pot-hole in the road, but it is still your fault!
Then they seem to think it is okay to ride 2-3 abreast, filling half the road. Well guess what; IT IS NOT. Why should we have to squeeze past you, or worse still go over the other side of the road, to overtake you which is putting us and other road user at risk? And just so you can have a chat. If you have to ride your bike at all, do it in a nice neat line just far enough away from the kerb to avoid the drains, just like it says in the Highway Code.
They will preach to you of course, that are 'doing their bit for the environment.' But guess what; the environment does not need saving. Since we have gone all green, the climate has gone to pot. We now get a winter which lasts 6 months with only 2 weeks of summer in compensation if we are lucky, and the extreme weather conditions which kill thousands, that used to be very rare, are now commonplace.
Yet they are actually doing far more damage to their precious environment anyway. Us normal folk, you know the ones in cars and vans, constantly have to slow down to get past them thus piling more noxious fumes into the environment they claim to care so much about. The only good thing about this of course, is that they are the ones breathing it in.
Then for reasons unbeknown to anyone, they shut entire roads at weekends for what is called a 'cycle event'. This basically means hundreds of these Lycra-clad motorcycle-wannabes flying around racing each other. We do that in our cars and we get fined, yet they are actually allowed to get away with it and we are made to stop and wait for them to go by. Unbelievable. I blame Sir Chris Hoy and Bradley Wiggins.
But cycling is not cool, not for anyone over the age 12 anyway. Let's face it, you only cycle as you cannot afford to run a car, and there is nothing cool about that.
If you are lucky enough to avoid the cyclists however, then odds are you will run into the other blight on our roads and pavements. Joggers. For some unknown reason this pastime has become a more and more popular in recent years. You cannot go anywhere without bumping them. Literally.
Heaven forbid you are actually minding your own business as a pedestrian as you will have to take evasive action to avoid being sent flying by one.
Of course it is better for them to be out running than sitting indoors watching TV, but the vast majority are not really doing very much at all. Not exactly running, just walking. Quickly. They are probably doing far more damage to their joints than anything else anyway. In fact I do not know a regular jogger who does not have problems with their knees or ankles. They will all be in wheelchairs before they are 50.
They think they are the bees-knees though. Oh yes. So much so that they can't wait to tell you all about it. Social media is now full of people 'tracking their runs'. But guess what. We don't care. You ran 3 miles in 25 minutes?? Nothing to boast about if you ask me. I can drive that far in 5 minutes, less if there are no cyclists on the road.
But it gets worse. Charity. The word that turns your blood cold. So not only do they want to get in your way as you walk down the street, flabby bits wobbly about all over the place, but they want you to sponsor them to do it.
It is for a good cause, they say. Yes a good cause that they don't really care about but are forced to support just so they can enter the stupid race in the first place. And if, God forbid, you don't sponsor them, oh they will make you feel guilty alright. But Erectile Dysfunction will survive without your 10p.
And it is not even as if they race anyway. They finish somewhere like 475th. Hang on a minute, I paid for this, the least you can do is finish in the top 10. No, for my £2.50 you should win the bloody thing!
There is a common theme here of course; Lycra. This must be the least flattering item of clothing ever invented. But it is far worse than that. It seems to have some sort of built-in personality changer. Whenever someone squeezes into these outfits, be it to jog or to cycle, they turn into a complete moron. All good manners, sense of logic and reason, go out the window.
Then, at the end of the day, they pop out of it and magically return to being human again. It is uncanny.
Yes we live in a dangerous world alright, but none so dangerous as those in Lycra.
Firstly, cyclists. Not your casual cyclist who rides to work on a sunny morning. No. I mean the Lycra-clad menaces who fill our streets, often 2-3 abreast, who assume the rules of the road do not apply to them.
Red lights? Pedestrian crossings? No, they don't have to stop at them. In fact these morons-on-two-wheels do not want to stop for anything. Too much traffic for them to squeeze past? Not a problem, they will just go on up the pavement, knocking pedestrians out of the way if they have to. One way street? That's okay, they are only going one way. The wrong way.
Yet you so much as overtake them slightly too close, which as far as they are concerned is within 25 feet of them, they will scream and shout and make hand gestures. And it is you in your car who has to take action to avoid them when they suddenly swerve to avoid a pot-hole in the road, but it is still your fault!
Then they seem to think it is okay to ride 2-3 abreast, filling half the road. Well guess what; IT IS NOT. Why should we have to squeeze past you, or worse still go over the other side of the road, to overtake you which is putting us and other road user at risk? And just so you can have a chat. If you have to ride your bike at all, do it in a nice neat line just far enough away from the kerb to avoid the drains, just like it says in the Highway Code.
They will preach to you of course, that are 'doing their bit for the environment.' But guess what; the environment does not need saving. Since we have gone all green, the climate has gone to pot. We now get a winter which lasts 6 months with only 2 weeks of summer in compensation if we are lucky, and the extreme weather conditions which kill thousands, that used to be very rare, are now commonplace.
Yet they are actually doing far more damage to their precious environment anyway. Us normal folk, you know the ones in cars and vans, constantly have to slow down to get past them thus piling more noxious fumes into the environment they claim to care so much about. The only good thing about this of course, is that they are the ones breathing it in.
Then for reasons unbeknown to anyone, they shut entire roads at weekends for what is called a 'cycle event'. This basically means hundreds of these Lycra-clad motorcycle-wannabes flying around racing each other. We do that in our cars and we get fined, yet they are actually allowed to get away with it and we are made to stop and wait for them to go by. Unbelievable. I blame Sir Chris Hoy and Bradley Wiggins.
But cycling is not cool, not for anyone over the age 12 anyway. Let's face it, you only cycle as you cannot afford to run a car, and there is nothing cool about that.
If you are lucky enough to avoid the cyclists however, then odds are you will run into the other blight on our roads and pavements. Joggers. For some unknown reason this pastime has become a more and more popular in recent years. You cannot go anywhere without bumping them. Literally.
Heaven forbid you are actually minding your own business as a pedestrian as you will have to take evasive action to avoid being sent flying by one.
Of course it is better for them to be out running than sitting indoors watching TV, but the vast majority are not really doing very much at all. Not exactly running, just walking. Quickly. They are probably doing far more damage to their joints than anything else anyway. In fact I do not know a regular jogger who does not have problems with their knees or ankles. They will all be in wheelchairs before they are 50.
They think they are the bees-knees though. Oh yes. So much so that they can't wait to tell you all about it. Social media is now full of people 'tracking their runs'. But guess what. We don't care. You ran 3 miles in 25 minutes?? Nothing to boast about if you ask me. I can drive that far in 5 minutes, less if there are no cyclists on the road.
But it gets worse. Charity. The word that turns your blood cold. So not only do they want to get in your way as you walk down the street, flabby bits wobbly about all over the place, but they want you to sponsor them to do it.
It is for a good cause, they say. Yes a good cause that they don't really care about but are forced to support just so they can enter the stupid race in the first place. And if, God forbid, you don't sponsor them, oh they will make you feel guilty alright. But Erectile Dysfunction will survive without your 10p.
And it is not even as if they race anyway. They finish somewhere like 475th. Hang on a minute, I paid for this, the least you can do is finish in the top 10. No, for my £2.50 you should win the bloody thing!
There is a common theme here of course; Lycra. This must be the least flattering item of clothing ever invented. But it is far worse than that. It seems to have some sort of built-in personality changer. Whenever someone squeezes into these outfits, be it to jog or to cycle, they turn into a complete moron. All good manners, sense of logic and reason, go out the window.
Then, at the end of the day, they pop out of it and magically return to being human again. It is uncanny.
Yes we live in a dangerous world alright, but none so dangerous as those in Lycra.
Thursday, 4 July 2013
Is it time for a summer Christmas?
IN LIGHT OF the current Co-Op advertising campaign in which they play the Andy Williams Christmas song 'The Most Wonderful Time of the Year' to promote their summer products, I started thinking; wouldn't it b great if we moved Christmas to the summer.
Don't laugh. Think about it. I have never quite understood the sense of having it in the middle of winter. The weather is dreadful, it gets dark at half-past three in the afternoon and most people are suffering from one nasty bug or another.
On top of that, winter is a depressing time of the year for many people. Plus it is also the most expensive with extra gas and electricity bills. Add Christmas into the mix, and all the extra stress that brings with it, and it is a recipe for disaster. It is no wonder that the suicide rate goes through the roof at this time of the year.
No. Surely it would make much more sense to move Christmas to a time of the year when most people are feeling happier and more at peace. Like August for example.
Lets look at the pluses. Firstly it would help to break up the 6 weeks summer holiday. Secondly the weather is likely to be good which would make travel plans to visit relatives that much easier. No road chaos due to ice and snow, less train and flight delays or cancellations. It would also lead to a far more pleasant Christmas Day experience.
Presents could be opened on the patio and Christmas dinner could be a bar-be-cue. The kids would be able to play in the garden, maybe get the paddling pool out, while the parents could be sipping Pimms and relaxing in the sun. Sounds good eh?
The only arguments I have heard in favour of leaving things as they are is all the clap-trap about Jesus' birthday and it being the only thing that currently makes winter bearable. Well lets look at that shall we.
Jesus was actually born in September, the seventh month of the old Jewish calendar. The Christmas celebration we know today was originally a pagan winter festival introduced to give the peasants something to look forward to in the bleak mid-winter. Quite how it became linked in to Jesus is unclear, although I suspect the Christians simply hijacked it.
I can certainly see the sense in having some sort of winter celebration. But with more and more people working right up until Christmas now, it's not like most of us get much of a break anyway. So leave the two Bank Holidays as they are and we could even have turkey for dinner if we felt so inclined. Plus of course, we would still have New Year's Day. That would break up winter nicely.
On the plus side it may even make January more bearable. There is always a post-Christmas hangover and that month seems to drag on forever. And to make matters worse you never have any money due to over-spending at Christmas. So the more you think about it, the more appealing it sounds to move Christmas to August, right.
I would actually move it to the time we currently have the late-summer Bank Holiday. The kids are off school, the weather is usually nice and it is closer to the actual birth of Jesus, if he did indeed really exist.
So there you have it. My case for having a summer Christmas. So are you with me?
Don't laugh. Think about it. I have never quite understood the sense of having it in the middle of winter. The weather is dreadful, it gets dark at half-past three in the afternoon and most people are suffering from one nasty bug or another.
On top of that, winter is a depressing time of the year for many people. Plus it is also the most expensive with extra gas and electricity bills. Add Christmas into the mix, and all the extra stress that brings with it, and it is a recipe for disaster. It is no wonder that the suicide rate goes through the roof at this time of the year.
No. Surely it would make much more sense to move Christmas to a time of the year when most people are feeling happier and more at peace. Like August for example.
Lets look at the pluses. Firstly it would help to break up the 6 weeks summer holiday. Secondly the weather is likely to be good which would make travel plans to visit relatives that much easier. No road chaos due to ice and snow, less train and flight delays or cancellations. It would also lead to a far more pleasant Christmas Day experience.
Presents could be opened on the patio and Christmas dinner could be a bar-be-cue. The kids would be able to play in the garden, maybe get the paddling pool out, while the parents could be sipping Pimms and relaxing in the sun. Sounds good eh?
The only arguments I have heard in favour of leaving things as they are is all the clap-trap about Jesus' birthday and it being the only thing that currently makes winter bearable. Well lets look at that shall we.
Jesus was actually born in September, the seventh month of the old Jewish calendar. The Christmas celebration we know today was originally a pagan winter festival introduced to give the peasants something to look forward to in the bleak mid-winter. Quite how it became linked in to Jesus is unclear, although I suspect the Christians simply hijacked it.
I can certainly see the sense in having some sort of winter celebration. But with more and more people working right up until Christmas now, it's not like most of us get much of a break anyway. So leave the two Bank Holidays as they are and we could even have turkey for dinner if we felt so inclined. Plus of course, we would still have New Year's Day. That would break up winter nicely.
On the plus side it may even make January more bearable. There is always a post-Christmas hangover and that month seems to drag on forever. And to make matters worse you never have any money due to over-spending at Christmas. So the more you think about it, the more appealing it sounds to move Christmas to August, right.
I would actually move it to the time we currently have the late-summer Bank Holiday. The kids are off school, the weather is usually nice and it is closer to the actual birth of Jesus, if he did indeed really exist.
So there you have it. My case for having a summer Christmas. So are you with me?
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